[N.B.: It is likely that many professors and poets of the established order are so insecure in their verb and rhetorical skills that they dare not engage in vigorous debate with adversaries. Besides, how can one, even if Harvard or Princeton educated, out-reason a reasonably intelligent adversary when one does not have reason on ones side?] Applicants need to demonstrate proven success at working within the established order—politically, literarily, and academically. They need not be tenured professors, though that would be helpful since all our previous laureates have come directly from that mold. A clear record of successful conformity therefore within the poet and academic communities, as well as friendly connections with public servants and knowledge of grant writing, would certainly be pertinent. Applicants should be able to provide at least three letters of recommendation (five would be better) from well-connected community members, including those of the state chamber of commerce and state cultural council. We would prefer applicants who work well with leaders, as opposed to those who might be apt to question and challenge them. (Wave makers and boat rockers need not apply!) We have no preference with regards to an applicant’s aesthetics and taste, but are especially interested in candidates with a particular bourgeois bent and insertion. Working-class roots, however, would be of interest as long as coupled with the latter. Finally, candidates are required to appreciate diversity and multiculturalism and should be able to demonstrate they can thrive within the limitations set by political correctness.
Interested candidates should send a letter of application outlining interest, qualifications, and preparation for this unique literary position. Also, they should address how they would intend raising public awareness and interest in established-order poetry and canon. We seek candidates with especially-neutral agendas and an emerging record of bridge building. Diversity candidates are particularly encouraged to apply.
The above announcement was sent via the following email:
From: George Slone todslone@yahoo.com
To: mswander@iastate.edu; jones@iastate.edu; ferlazzo@iastate.edu; online@iastate.edu; deb-west@uiowa.edu; eptcoutreach@Lcom.net; owlglass@avalon.net; BenjaminPercy@aol.com; engldept@iastate.edu; nbowers@iastate.edu; brottman@iastate.edu; susanc@iastate.edu; jhagge@iastate.edu; sidner@iastate.edu; neiln@iastate.edu; lpoague@iastate.edu; cjpost@iastate.edu; dph@iastate.edu; shenk@iastate.edu; dwiegand@iastate.edu; gbetcher@iastate.edu; consigny@iastate.edu; bdaly@iastate.edu; demaraye@iastate.edu; cgh@iastate.edu; dkienzle@iastate.edu; mendy@iastate.edu; jminkler@iastate.edu; spett@iastate.edu
Sent: Tuesday, June 9, 2009 10:07:48 AM
Subject: Experiment in Free Speech: State Poet Laureate of Iowa Wanted
Dear English Department professors, Iowa State University, et al:
Please examine the watercolor created on Mary Swander, Poet Laureate of the State of Iowa, and Governor Chet Culver: http://wwwtheamericandissidentorg.blogspot.com/. Please do comment! After all, if poets and professors don't appreciate the importance of vigorous debate, cornerstone of democracy, then the nation is truly in deep trouble, as I fully suspect it is. Sadly, experience dictates the likelihood of even just one of you responding to be remote. Think about what that implies! Think about what it implies for students!
Also, please consider subscribing to The American Dissident, a unique literary journal (only $20/year). Your students would surely appreciate its caustic, satirical tone.
Thank you for your attention.
Sincerely,
G. Tod Slone, PhD and Founding Editor
The American Dissident: Journal of Literature, Democracy & Dissidence
A 501 c3 Nonprofit Providing a Forum for Vigorous Debate, Cornerstone of Democracy
http://www.theamericandissident.org/
1837 Main St.
Concord, MA 01742
